30801952 TRIP TO THE WEST1952
Do not get involved in groups. It will be a mess. I want you to realize by actual experience. I, personally, tell you to do one thing. You can attend to your external duties, as you have been doing, but find some hours — one, two or three hours a day — when you could, all alone, devote yourself to what I will tell you to do now.
In silence and in seclusion, all alone in one room, with all your heart, cry out, deep down in you cry and say, "Baba, let me see God who is in me! Baba, let me see God in me!" Cry out with such longing that during these hours you want nothing else but to see God. And, Consuelo dear, you will see him. Will you carry this out? You will then see God.
Do it honestly, as if your very life depended on it. Nothing more, nothing less. If you want to see God as he ought to be seen, do this, I tell you. You are so dear to me, and I will help you, but do it very honestly. Cry, cry, cry! God wants us to see Him, longs for it more than we long for Him. It is the truth. I know it. But He wants to be seen. How? With great longing and aspiration. Try it. You will have the longing if you try honestly. We must see him in this very body. So, will you try?
Consuelo said she would.
On 14 May 1952, Toni Roothbert had had a second interview with Baba, at which time Baba explained to her:
I understand all. Even if you had not said anything, I know all. So take very seriously what I explain especially for you. I will explain it to you very clearly, and if you grasp it thoroughly, you will never again be confused. Mind has a habit of getting exalted and then going down — sometimes full of faith, sometimes full of doubts. So, in spite of our trying to seek Truth, one sometimes lands in a mess and feels so dry at heart.