40681956 TRIP TO THE WEST1956
Baba gathered everyone again and said: "
Do not expect any discourse from me today. Yesterday, I told you all that you would play and feel relaxed [here]. One thing I want you all to know. You do not realize how very fortunate you are when I embrace you all. In India, when I go out to give my darshan, in southern India, Andhra State, traveling about from east to west, there are thousands who come for my darshan, and they all love me very much; a number of them are ready to lay down their lives for me at my signal. Yet they have no chance for my embrace or my close company because the rush is so great. When they approach me, the person behind is pushing them on, and the one behind him is pushing too; so, just for a second, they can have my contact and then it is finished. They do not have any chance of sitting near me or embracing me, although they love me very much.
In Los Angeles, there was no time for you all to sit near me as you are doing today, for so many people came there and I was so busy. Therefore, I wanted particularly to have a [free] day here.
You have seen my mood changing, as it did in London.
Eruch interrupted: "Sometimes, all of a sudden Baba appears very lighthearted, very happy, and he makes us feel very happy at the same time. He mixes with the children, he plays with them, runs about like a child, and he appears to be very, very happy. Suddenly, there is a change in Baba's mood. He appears to us very tired and very sick, as if something has happened to him. Yet, there is nothing that we can see. He appears to us to be very loving sometimes — full of love, overflowing with love, and we feel as if we want to do nothing but love him. Again, there is a change in mood, and he appears to us to be very stern or fiery, and at such moments, we would like not to love him, but just to pay respect to him and wait for his orders and instructions."
Baba remarked, "No one can understand my ways. I am beyond your understanding. Only Perfect Masters can know me and my ways.
"Another point," Baba continued. "As you all become more intimate with me, with opportunities to come closer to me, all that is good and all that is bad within you comes out in sparks, as it were.